it hurts more in the daytime
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
