We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
