just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
