I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Randomize
