Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
