I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
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