you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
