He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
