dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
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