YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Randomize
