So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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