If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
