I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
