It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
