we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
