I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
whose ass print is on the piano?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
