He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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