Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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