She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
