You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
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