READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Farmville is her only friend.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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