sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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