when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
