Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
