Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
