3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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