He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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