If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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