Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
