Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
