I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
