I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
