like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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