ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
