It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
