I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
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