If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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