do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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