We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
