What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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