Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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