sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize