I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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