Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
