I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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