They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
