am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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