Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Randomize
