even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
