I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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